Tuesday, 21 June 2011

First Impressions

In life, no matter who you are every few years you're going to go to a new and totally different environment, when you first start school, high school, when you move to another place, when you enter university, when you start working, In all of these situations you'll probably be alone with no one you know there and making a good impression will be.... well not really that important but better then making a bad impression.
First impressions and how our first meeting with people could set the tone for the whole relationship, I know we all wish we had made a better first impression with certain people, and how better our relationships would be if they started out on the right foot

When we meet people for the first time, a lot of factors come into our head that help us categorise them as good or bad people, friends or potential enemies, nice or arrogant.
A lot of how we judge people when we first see them comes from past experiences with people, if you've been robbed by a french guy, then french people will probably make a bad impression on you.

The media also has a subtle effect on us, they show us images of say a black guy robbing a store or an Arab guy, then they switch to scenes of an explosion, I wonder if they are hinting at anything?

I wonder what they're trying to say...
Yes I'm such a racist....

Although I think I moved a bit off topic, back to the main issue, when we first meet people we don't know what happened to them before they met us, we could see them with their hair messed up, and a torn shirt and think that they are slobs, because that's what we see that's how we judge, its the very first time I see you, and you cant change that first impression, its for life.

They could have just finished a football game, but we don't know that, so we judge, and as we are judging them, we are giving them a first impression of ourselves as well, we see a guy who looks like he just sweated a bucket and is now raving like a lunatic, and we don't say anything to them, and he would see some cold guy who is giving him a disapproving look, its a two-way thing, as people make first impressions on us, we make first impressions on them.

How accurate are our initial feelings? that's hard to tell, but generally if you're a good judge of character, you'll be able to tell who is and isn't worth your time just from the first meeting.

Almost 10 years ago when I was in school, my class played football with another class, and one of the people on their side was to put it bluntly, being a dick, he was showing off and insulting every person within earshot. I disliked him from the moment I saw him.

Fast Forward 10 years, and I met him again, this time though he was going to be my room mate :/
Although he might have changed during the the last 10 years, this was my first time meeting him since then, and my only interaction with this guy was a football game long ago, but it was enough to make me feel defensive around him. that, and the fact that we don't get along at all.

Would our relationship be different if we had met in better circumstances? I don't know, but I think not, as even if we had a good first meeting, eventually his all around jerk behaviour would show up anyways.

I believe first impressions are usually quite accurate, but that's what my experiences have taught me, when I meet new people I tend to be quiet and observe them, see how they respond to me before i judge them, anyone worth anything will try to get to know you even if you don't say anything, while the less-then-useless people will just dismiss you, and that's a good basis to know who is and isn't worth your time.