Sunday 12 June 2011

What is shallow?

Well lets start with what the dictionary defines as shallow.

It usually means a man/woman who only judges by looks and not by personality. 
Personally I believe it's a term that is massively overused. Is it so wrong to judge a person for their looks and try to get some information about them through how they dress/look?




So if I judge the person above as someone I don't want to date, does that make me shallow? I'm not factoring in her personality of course, she might be the nicest woman in the entire world, she might be funny, smart, kind, caring, understanding and athletic..... well probably not very athletic but lets say she's full of positive traits, yet I am not attracted to her, am I shallow? does that make me a bad person because I judged her based on looks? hmm.

A lot of (wo)men are called shallow because they aren't willing to date someone unless they are of a certain level of attractiveness, we call these people shallow because they don't give a chance to people who Do want to date them ( but might not be attractive enough for them )but instead run off and try to find someone else, someone better looking, how shallow.

Yet I don't find that a bad thing, is it wrong to pursue what you want? If we compare people to jobs and everyone has a dream job and wont settle for something else, is it so different with people? if you want the person you will spend the rest of your life with to be attractive, is that a bad thing? is it Shallow?

But what if the person You like doesn't feel the same way about you? Ahh, you ask them out and they say no, That's so shallow of them, they didn't want to date me so of course the fault is with them, how rude, how hurtful, how shallow.

Now the shoe is on the other foot, we are judging others for things we have all probably done in our life, we judge them for rejecting now, for making us feel bad, and to get back at them we call them shallow, only interested in looks.

But I am drifting from my point here, and that is that few people are truly shallow, the rest of the people just want to be with someone they think completes them and looks are only skin deep yet that's what brings us to people, that's what makes us get close to them, but after we get close we find out there is so much more to them then just a pretty face, they have their own interests and hobbies, their own problems and pains, their own history and dreams, and we spend so much time with them we forget about their looks and focus on the things we cant see, the things that really matter underneath....

I don't think that's shallow at all ^.^



7 comments :

  1. Yo haven't seen anyone put it that way bro :)
    I totally agree with you :)

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  2. I have to agree with you, we first would be attracted to the look than the rest, i do not feel that is shallow, everyone perception of beauty is different anyway, the one you avoid might be anothers preference, hence, i do not think it would be in any way wrong!!

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  3. very nice....had a good structure, liked the perspective used for it...10/10 man

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  4. It would be cool if somebody disagreed, I'd like to hear how people oppose this idea actually.

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  5. You are right in many ways. Though I think people who don't even try to get to your last step are more shallow then others. I can't respect people who can't consider one seriously because they have more body weight.

    ~Amoe

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  6. You are right about the overusage of the term itself, many people are indeed called shallow just for being...well,people. Isn´t it human, and healthy in my opinion, to pursue the things you like? Looks, a big wallet, a sincere smile, a brilliant mind, whatever makes you happy... Thing is, we don´t judge people only in the moment we meet them, on that one decisive moment our little brain decides if we´re attracted or not. We do it constantly. In my opinion, we´re not shallow for feeling attracted with someone good looking ( being only a matter of "personal taste" what each of us consider good looking ) but we are as shallow as it gets when we let that fact overcome all the other things that might affect our judgement on wether thats the right person for us or not. -"she´s a narrow minded ignorant fool, but she´s sooooooo beautyful..."

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